Left-bound Train of Thought

Do you think that people take more left or right hand turns in a lifetime? Statistically, the more times you flip a coin, the closer the probability gets to be half and half. However, flipping coins don't have habits or external forces acting upon them. Hmm...

I find that when I have absolutely no idea which way to turn, I will instinctively turn right. It makes sense, I am a right handed person. I have a dominant hand, which dictates my dominate direction. Lefties probably turn left when in a directional quandary. Righties, give yourself two right hand points. Lefties, give yourself two left hand points. If you find yourself lost often, give yourself another point towards your dominate hand.

But there has got to be more to it than that. There are so many more determining factors.

Most all freeway exits are to the right! But, most all on-ramps are to the left. Agh, thought I had one there. When you think about it though, a ramp isn't really a turn just a veer. From now we will be playing by the strict interpretation of the King Benjamin Rules: A "turn" shall be defined as a change in course of 90 degrees. That settles that.

Cloverleaf intersections are a different story. A north bound car wanting to go west (or left) has to make three rights! Hurray for the righties- give yourself a right hand point, two if you are a frequent cloverleafer.

Roundabouts have to be another victory for the righties. To execute a left hand turn, you take a right into the round about and a right out. But wait. If you really think about it, a left on a roundabout by King Benjamin Rules is two rights and three lefts. So a left turns out to be a left after all. If you are a confused roundabouter, give yourself a left hand point for multiple trips 'round.

U-turners and back-trackers, give yourself a left hand point. This also includes those of you who are indecisive, have poor map skills, or poor sense of direction.

Culture has a hand to play in this too. While in Fort Stockton, I was at a bar with a dance floor. When the locals danced, they would slowly make their way around the dance floor counterclockwise. If you enjoy dancing on the border, give yourself a left hand point. I am sure that there are numerous other cultural examples, regrettably, I am not that cultured.

Geography played a part with the roundabouts, but what else? Height, sex, weight, race, social class? None of them would seem to have a left or right bias. Political affiliation? Left vs. Right Wing is too absurd; even for this train of thought.

Sports, haHA! If your sport was on a track give yourself five left hand points for every year you played the sport. Swimmers, you probably turn left to face back down the pool on kick sets and following every interval, plus three left hand points for every year of participation. Football, Baseball, Basketball: you don't get a say in this. Take that major sports!

Dogs usually make a couple of counter-clockwise circles before they really settle in. That would be two left hand points... if you did that. If you do; stop it.

Well, tally up the scores. I think you will find that you will make more left hand turns in you life than right hand turns. I was really pulling for right hand turns, oh well, you can't win them all.

What have we learned today? We learned that I entertain some ridiculous notions. I mean really, who thinks about this kind of stuff?